Love...and Love.

There were two chapters on Love....actually I'm pretty sure there were more than that...but I just read two.
Both named "Love"
both with different subtitles.

How to really love other people
- so I think my problem doesn't really lay here.  I think I might actually love other people a little too much.  I'm even getting better at it lately.

My problem is with myself...so I get to the next chapter:

How to really love yourself:
oh how wonderfully fitting.

"I never for a second felt like I was worthy of anybody's compliments"
Sorry, but I feel like this on a daily basis.
It might just be the whole "depression state" that kills me, but whenever someone says anything complimentary to me I just think in my head "hahaha omg you're so wrong"
I don't know why I do it, I just don't like myself....and I don't understand why people like me, and sometimes I wish they didn't (in fact I've had this feeling a lot lately)

I try not to let it affect how I act with other people, because to me so many people are so much better than I am, in fact it kind of inspires me to be a better person- though I never feel like I can be.
Don has this problem where he needs affection.
I have this problem where I don't think I deserve it, but I give it out like it is my darhma. (if I was hindu that would be a good one, but I'm not...so I'll just say life duty)

I have this problem more with God....his love is so great...too great for me I feel, but here it is.  I don't think my problems is wanting more affection from other people, in fact I wish that would stop because it is horribly distracting.  I just need to accept God's affection and start letting it reflect in myself.

.....I have no idea how to do this.  It is hard for me to comprehend it even..the thought of allowing that.

I don't hate myself, I just think I am so unworthy of everything-- because I am.

....I don't know how to change this
\: crap.